DOOMSDAY:Cookin The Tears Of The Oposition

Golden State Doom part 2, the search for Relavency

Moody has been such a bright spot. (like a laser beam to the cornea curry has lost it)

Dubs come out firing. (Firing Kerr, firing Steph, firing Dunleavy, firing the stadium and claiming insurance)

God we play four guards (it takes big balls to play that type of small ball)

We are a pace and space team. That's when we are at our best. (lol Steve Kerr posting his own coaching tropes in message boards)

Damn something is wrong with Steph. He’s been getting great looks (chef steph, switched from cooking with gas to cooking meth)

Instead of trading for Jimmy, we might have been better off just starting moody. (I feel Jimmy will definitely be starting and finishing moody at GSW)

Instead of trading for Jimmy, we might have been better off just starting moody. (somebody said - 'yes 120 million')

Steph is going to be like this a lot of nights. Thats why GS is no longer a contender. He’ll have some fin flashback nights now and then. (his flashbacks to this season will be PTSD)

Bron and his untraceable peds. (If peds really worked wouldn't Lebron have hair? Untraceable due to Bronnie's sole purpose to be a dna matching donor for urine, blood, samples - oh and eventually a walking organ donor for Lebron to defeat father time)

but it's steph being washed... (Ironically the chef is cooked)

I like this version of Curry..just keep shooting man (much like the end scene of bonnie and clyde or butch cassidy and the sundance kid or shrek 4)

And I am impressed we only gave up 15 layups from fast break (if your standards were any lower you would date yourself)

Some pretty low participation and pessimism abounds , as the sound of people jumping off the band wagon threatens to cause a seismic event or end the tech boom.

 

Ladies and Germs: standing in for our tear-cookin' emcee, The Showtime Mamba:

GSW fan: they spent the whole trade window planning one effing move
this organization is clueless top to bottom.

STMamba: (I guess the Butler didn't do it)

But, but, but their owner said:
“We’re light-years ahead of probably every other team in structure, in planning, in how we’re going to go about things,” he said. “We’re going to be a handful for the rest of the N.B.A. to deal with for a long time.” Joe Lacob, Warriors Owner

Signing a diva on his downslide for 2 yrs, $121 mil is a "light-years-ahead" move? I think we will see about that.

 

so much gold here, but these were my favorites.

 

…. Great stuff

 

No Bron. No Luka. Just HIM............

The DOOM is gonna be so F'n good

 

Can't wait.

 

A whole new generation of true Laker haters is about to be born. Great times.

 

Lakers vs the Indiana pacemakers who today are Doomed if they do and DOOMED if they don't.

Damn their entire starting lineup is out. Lakers by 20 (another fan posted 'this man knows Pacer basketball lol)

I'd love a won but I'd absolutely love to blow these dudes out since espn jumped the gun anticipating Luka's return (you will just have to find another avenue to blow dudes out. No guts no gloryhole I guess)

I’m gonna f***in punch my tv. (yeah up yours you smart tv, it's all your fault!)

18 minutes in and we’ve had 1 starter score. They’ve totally s*** the bed (bed s***ting must be an Indiana thing)

Rick has 4 zero point scorers on the court right now (law of averages says the next guy has to score)

Goose egg haliburton (that name is catchy but definitely has no ring to it)

Toppin is f***ing done. holy s*** this game could not be going worse (Credit do, everytime we needed a stop or a rebound obi killed their momentum)

Turning this s*** off. They expect us to believe there’s no game fixing by the refs, but how do you explain those goal tending calls? It’s either deliberate, or they’re all incompetent. Either way isn’t a good look.(somebody commented it's not the refs' fault Haliburton has zero points)

Siakim and Haliburton 0 pts combined synchronized bed s***ting (I can see it now, performed to the tune of 'sweet georgia BROWN')

Tyrese with the impressive 0-0-0 stat line, doing his best Tony Snell impersenation (He is a snell of his former self)

If I had to base my opinion of the Pacers only on national TV games, I’d think they were the worst team in the history of the league.(They are getting Hoosiered).

We need someone in the media to start actually talking about how awful Haliburton is (first they need to educate them about where Indiana is and let them know they still have a bastketball team)

I actually placed real legitimate United States currency on this game and then this is what happens, blame me for this guys ts happens everytime (I personally only gamble with monopoly money and wooden nickles)

f*** these refs (These Pacer fans are sex mad)

European onlooker here.. Should I just go to bed? (Yes and give the hick a French lick)

Blame this on Rick. How are we 50 games into the season and still haven’t figured out an answer to a 2-3 zone? Launching 3s every possession and not getting anything easy at all (Carrey's coaching trajectoring is dumb and.....dumber)

We got a live cam on Lebron/ Luka and missing actual nba play on the court because this team is so sorry. (posted for truth....and doom)

Why does Reaves have a generational whistle? Don't answer that, we know why (generational whistle, umm lip genetics?)

Carlisle’s bold new game plan this year is to pretend we’re melting down, the other team gets complacent, and then we force turnovers, truly a basketball genius (Carrey has no way to MASK his simplistic strategies)

Alex Len please save us! (said nobody ever until today and then they said it twice in five minutes)

 

lol

lol for old person reference.

in fairness, i get the sense these were ironic/funny posts.

 

Luka, Lakers and all that Jazz in today's edition of DOOM.


Luka gonna scorch earth, and with Dirk in the building. Mavs owners are stupid as f*** (Life is just a bucket of fried chicken for Luka)

I can’t decide which Jazz player I want to pop off more.

Some vintage Clarkson absolute f***ery?

Walker dominating and stunting on these hoes?

Lauri popping off with the skill and precision of an elven gazelle?

Perhaps a rookie coming out party? So many options (It's a buffet and every option is a s*** and cheese sandwich)

LeBron has been hitting the Lefuckaway since before I had hair on my balls (correlation is not causation)

Joker is going to feast on this version of the Lakers (Doncic is just gonna feast, his personal trainer is really just a world class uber driver)

Jarred Vanderbilt revenge game ( I love the thought Vanderbilt would want revenge for being sent to the Lakers)

LeBron washed (more than you can say for Harden)

I like sex (Too bad sex doesn't like you)

half our team is playing like they want to pose for a picture and autograph from LeBron. (They can form an orderly line in the paint to get posterised)

(summarise the game in two words or less) belt a**

Injury Report: Dalton Knecht (Jet lag) will not play tonight (lol)

Miss America gonna dump Kessler for this performance (I guess if Miss America can't perform the duties the runner up will be appointed)

This switch everything defense is so dumb (I call it the Laker defense after all these years)

Lakers look good. Their defense is tenacious. (love seeing this comment)

these guys look like they have their sharpies ready to get their shoes and jerseys autographed after the game. maybe take a few selfies after getting their a**** beat. coaches should send them back to Utah on a grayhound. (How about some festive mormon tandem cycles)

This matchup was Silver's wet dream after the Luka Laker caper (Hater clearly from Salty lake city)

ANALYSIS. A franchise that is consigned to the TANK. Most people hear were clear headed, and just talking about the finer points of their players capabilities. Not much anger. So a little smooth Jazz rather than bebop or fusion tonight.

 

Man, Vando sure got "revenge" on the Jazz for them trading him to the Los Angeles Lakers!

 

lol

 

The Lakers vs the Portland Jail breakers - total Doomination


I went to Kobe's last game in the Rose Garden and it was legit like an away game. I was so pissed. (cool to hear)

Anyone know where I can watch the big game tonight? (Probably at any recently ex-Mavs fans crib or you could share a tear stained couch with Anthony Davis)

Start Bronny, you cowards! (How about his 40 something dad Lebronykins)

Alright it’s 7pm and the blazers play tonight, I can’t wait to turn my YouTube TV on and go to KATU to watch… jeopardy (Alex I'll take Doom for $1000)

Jerami is beyond due for an efficient 30 point game. (Greg Oden is due for an efficient and working knee replacement)

I like the look of their energy (it's not an aura it's glaucoma combined with a seizure)

Too many laker fans in attendance. Do not like (Your fault for drafting Bowie over Jordan)

Deni flush! (sound like Clipper Doom here)

Man every time I watch Ant and Grant I wonder what happened. Are they playing s*** on purpose? (if their dreams were sucked out of them any faster it would have to be via a hydraulic jawed Kardashian)

When can we stop play Grant. He is so f***ing washed (cleanliness is next to scrubliness)

Austin Reaves does nothing but foul bait what a bum (Austin a cheater, but the a** of a thoroughbred race horse or a Congolese gorilla)

lol blazers are trash nothing but turnovers (someone commented 'lol this dudes first comment on this account')

I really hate all the yellow in the crowd tonight. It's been like a noxious fungus growing every Blazer v Laker game for the past decade. Spreading like a diseased tree. It needs to end. The rot needs to be cut out. f*** the L*kers and their fans. (all those Laker pod people we planted in Portland is really paying off)

Reeves flopping all over the place (Trying to Red Pill Reaves, it sounds like he needs to be little blue pilled)

Blazers playing like me coming off a nap. But I’m awake now so hopefully they wake up too (No other way to say it, this son of a b**** is stupid)

Was that 3 steps, a hop, then the bucket? Like what? (the you have crabs dribble?)

I was really excited for this game. Might have to watch tv with my wife instead ( The game is so bad it might save his marriage)

Seriously cant understand why we just keep taking long jumpers against this lakers team man. Zero IQ (have you seen our 3 pt defence?)

Grant has 0 points, 0 rebounds and 0 assists in 12 minutes (Nice doing a Roy Hibbert but with ultra efficiency)

Jerami “2 1sts” Grant (As Oscar Wilde would say, Trailblazer GMs know the price of everything and the value of nothing)

Haha KC "Reaves embellishes" (embellishes like a mother******)

The man is committing acts of terrorism! (on Reaves' flopping)

Are Ant and Jerami on drugs? (once you go crack, you never go back)

I swear to god JG must be sucking off billups in the locker room. Only reason why he does not get benched (That is why Billups is the Head coach)

Jerami said I got my 1 assist for the night it’s meeeee time (magic of stats)

JG leash is ridiculous. Dude is just ball hogging at this point (making the ball squeal like a pig deliverance style)

chauncey billups just stands there and claps lol, he's also an elite arm crosser (at least his hands are out of his pockets)

I’m convinced Jerami and Ant are on some sort of drugs. Fentanyl? (hardcore laxatives explaine their s***ty play, reminds me of the bball scene in the basketball diaries)

Jerami Grant should not see the court again that's how bad he's been playing. Straight up robbing money from the franchise.

People get put in jail for stealing a lot less. (a contract killer tried tonight on this basketball court)

Obviously don’t engage with them but Lakers fans in their game thread complaining about Deni’s whistle and “foul baiting” is the “most pot calling the kettle black” b******* I’ve ever read lmaooooo
do they realize he drives into the paint like Lightning McQueen on PCP and it’s hard to stop it without fouling? (spys in our game threads, or as I call them hoes in different area codes)

J.J Reddick is corny as f*** (and you my friend are as horny as cuck )

Lakers commentators Stu and Bill are great. Always unbiased. Even Stu was yelling no way that’s a goaltend (quoted for truth)

Gabe Vincent with the weirdest beard pattern (it's a horshack rorschach)

Watching reaves is going to be my joker origin (just keep lady ga ga away from it, your town definitely needs an enema)

Did someone sell Grant some cursed crystals? (crystals meth?)

Reeves had 4 Harden posters above his bed. (the Blazer fans are obsessed with Reaves magic Laker whistle)

I like how our tank lineup is just our regular lineup (a panzer planzer)

Why are there so many Laker fans here? (because we own your ugly a**** and it's straight up Stockholm Syndrome - your fans are our hostages)

Not excited to see the vets for another half a season (uno reverse our dogs put down your vets tonight)

LeBron probably got his taint powder all over the ball. That's why our shooting is off tonight. (poster following the psychopath - does taint powder even exist in our world or just his?)

If only we had one of the best rebounding centres in the league on our bench (same)

Don’t think I’ve ever seen Chauncey talk to Ant or Grant the way he “coaches” Shaedon, Scoot or Deni (not a Chauncey in Hell son)

hahaha story of the night man, JG+ANT f*** us again. (Portland fans turning Freudian fan fiction into manual hand friction)

 

.

…. plus assorted others. gritty, edgy Doom.

 

Or Oden over Durant

 

Lakers vs the Doomver Nugget in which Colorado gets a six pack and a biscuit.

somebody had a fat man meme of Luka chubby happy and walking (someone commented 77, more like 277 - I lol'd)

Time for the nuggets to get another win tonight let's move this winning streak to double digits (you will have to settle for sitting on double digits and spinning)

Jokic monster triple double tonight. I feel it in my balls. (the mystic orbs he calls his Denver nuggets)

I call them the Los Angeles Likers, because they like a really bad basketball team (back into the fields you a** turnip)

lakers are the purple diarrhea (you may need to seek medical help, just remember Dr J isn't a proctologist)

I can see Luka’s teet meat in that jersey (ok silence of the lambs)

Why is Jokic wearing his purple shoes against the Lakers? (code for sign me in a year or so)

f*** the mavericks (lol)

I don’t care what anyone says, Austin Reaves looks clumsy as hell. Nothing graceful about his game. (putting the Gin in GINobli)

f*** - (the Nuggets fanbase would like to f*** in no particular order the Lakers, Jerry West, Hollywood, Lebron, Jack Nicholson, Johnny Depp, Adam Silver, Sinner (tennis number 1) , the Ukraine, Russia, Putin, Trump, Kamala Harris, the league and ...their ex-girlfriend)

Oh yay, Richard jefferson. (read that in his voice)

nuggets still winning (you are winning at losing and losing at life)

 

Lakers vs the Nuggets of Doom Part II

Russ wtf is that pass (russers gonna russ troll)

THREE FOULS IN 30 SECONDS (at this rate he will do a Nicolas Cage and be gone in 60 seconds)

Editorial Comment these fans are pieces of s*** - somebody posted a Kobe soft clip and someone replied with a helicopter crashing (I repeat pieces and s*** combined)

Mods please ban these garbage lakers fans. None of us are going to their cesspool of a sub (I feel personally attacked)

f*** THE LAKERS f*** THE LAKERS f*** THE LAKERS. I hate how many Lakers fans always show up to these games (can't sell out without selling out)

Jesus christ can we PLEASE get a rebound??!! (refreshing to see)

Luka is cooking the nuggets god dman (the only six pack he has at the moment is Mickey D's nuggets, probably trying to ween himself off them)

Push my fingers into my a** (s*** just got real y'all)

Russ needs to stop with the dumb TOs (let Russ be Russ the Denver fans know what time it is)

Russ hopefully just knocking some rust off lol he’s been kinda rough (he is all Rust all day , RUSTLE Westbrook)

Westbrook outta control when he plays lakers (he's so excited, he's about to lose control and I think I like it)

Westbrook being a basketball terrorist today. (thankfully Rob will no longer negotiate with Russ)

Westbrook is taking the piss (that's why they call him the catheter)

Lakers defence was pretty damn good there ngl (sane Nugget fan or laker infiltrator?)

Name a better duo than reaves and free throw line (a match made in basketball heaven, maybe Russ and a construction company)

I put some hallucinogenic liquids in Austin Reaves headband, should be kicking in here soon (see if he starts playing like Bill Walton)

The lakers have become daddy (I like the simplicity of this capitulation)

Summation, the Nuggets are a weird group. Hate a lot of people, not keen on Russ or Malone, definitely Laker fans, just a miserable group really. No big meltdowns and just various lamentations about the state of their team and D (yeah I know)

 

Russ and the side of the backboard?